RIP, Cat

I never like cats. I am not a cat person and heck, I am not even an animal person. I don't like pets and I don't ever think that I want one. Although several times in my lifetime, my family had rabbits as pets.

Yeah I acknowledge sometimes that they are cute and fluffy and all but, I am the-look-only-no-touch type.

So anyway, I think I had a cat. And it died. erk. I don't even know if it was male or female. I didn't name it, I just called it "cat". Fyi, it was white, while black spot at the end of its tail, I think. And it was kinda cute, I guess.

It isn't like it was my pet. It is just that I've been sort of feeding the cat for the past couple of months.

I found it when it was small, at the side of my house with the mother. Well, not "I" but my nephews and my bro. My bro lahhh started feeding him at first, he sort of wanted it to adopt it as pet. He once scare the cat off, so the cat kinda scared of him.. everytime he came near, the cat will ran off. The mother is friendlier though. So anyway, you know people say, once you start feeding the cat, they sort of stick with you? That was what happened. We just cant get rid of them. ANDDDDDDDDDDD they irritates the hell out of me.

I don't like cats. I don't like their meowing for food. I cook at the wet kitchen outside so whenever I went out to cook or doing the laundry or doing anything at the kitchen, they will start meowing. I swear I felt like kicking them away. I am not kidding. lol. but i am not cruel either. So, i ended up giving them food. I just can't stand seeing them meowing like that. I pity them. I have a very soft heart, like you don't know. hahahaah.Well after all, they are God's creatures as well.

I even bought cat food ok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! hahahaah because sometimes I can't find food in the house to feed them. It became my habit after every meal, to keep the leftovers, so I can give them to the cats. So to make my life easier I bought cat food. I never thought I'll be a cat caretaker, but I did.

We tried to ya know, relocate them to another place. But it was so hard to catch them. I CANNOT TOUCH THEM! seriously I can give them food but not touch. eeeee. One day, we (myself, my brother Dik and my nephews imran adam) set off Project Relocate. The idea was to give them food and lure them into the cage. But whenever my brother was at the cage, the cats didn't come. But if it was me, they will happily come at me. I remember the mother came close to my feet and I already got goosebumps. My brother told me to pick it up and put it in the cage.. but I just can't do it. I stroked it a few times but I just cant hold it. So I abandoned the project. haha.

To cut the story short, without my knowledge, my brother managed to catch the mother and relocate it at a mamak's restaurant about few kilometres away from home. I was pretty angry that he separated the mother and the kitten. I even smsed him that. hahahaha. I saw the kitten sitting alone and I think it was cold, so it started encroaching the kitchen area. Sometimes I saw it curled up on floor towels, and once I saw it sleep on the rack admist the papers and some paperbags. My maternal instinct kicked in, and I thought ok for the time being, I'll take care of it. The cat is still nervous around people but not me. Then came this one point of time when I thought, oh well, I guess I am meant to take care of this little cat. Maybe if I try open up, I may be able to have it as pet. who knows right? Maybe I'll end up being an old lady with a cat. I tried, hard to touch it, but he usually turn away. Maybe he knows that I didn't really want him. He only came to me when he wants food. I hate being taken for granted. HAHAHA. But at least, he felt safe with me.

I had my days. Some days I am quite loveable, paying extra attention to it, without touching. But there were days when i seriously feel like flushing it down the toilet, if i managed to catch it. There were times when I was doing laundry, when I went back and forth from the house to the laundry line and the cat keep following me at my feet (geli ok!) and it was staring at my feet like they were food. Seriously. I saw something evil in its eyes. It freaked me out ok!!!!

Sometimes it annoyed the hell out of me because I have to find them food when I haven't even cook food for the humans in the house. There was this one day, I think it was the last time I gave it food.. I gave it chicken feet. I was having a long day, I was cleaning the chicken for dinner. Cat came meowing at me. I didn't have anything to give him. I didn't want to give him the chicken meat so I ended up giving it the chicken feet. Now, I felt sick in my tummy. HAHHAA. You know how tough chicken feet are if they are not cooked yet. I saw it tried to bite the feet but failed and it looked at me. I took them back later, and chopped it into small pieces, but still the cat can't eat it. So I think about 2 hours later, once all my human food were cook, I took some rice and mix it with dried anchovies and gave it to the cat. Haha and I picked up the chicken feet and threw it into the bin.

So anyway, 2 weekends ago we found it dead after we had this foul smell around the house. No wonder I haven't seen it around. My dad and my nephews found it, dead for sometime judging by the smell and the look of maggots on it. My older brother Lachik was the one tasked to remove and buried it. He said it was squishy. Yucks.

I was quite sad. I wish I know the cause of death. I hope it was not because of the chicken feet. I know the cat & I wasn't that close but I didn't want it dead. All I want was somebody else take care of it. I wanted iy to have a good home, where people can love it like it deserved. At first I thought I took care of it just for temporary before we relocate it, but well, its time with me in fact was just temporary.

To cat, RIP. I am sorry for the days when I chased you off with the penyapu lidi. I am so very sorry for the chicken feet incident. I am sorry that we took your mom away from you. To cat's mom, I am sorry that your baby is dead. I hope Cat is happy in cat's heaven.